Friday, April 16, 2010

What Exactly is CHONE?

(One of many victims to the CHONE)

All around the lacrosse community there are words and phrases that get tossed around in which only the most knowledgeable of lax bros can comprehend what they truly mean. Whether its a greaser, ripping the duck, or twine tickling 101, these combinations of words truly transform one's vocabulary. The newest term to grace the turf of Memorial Field? Chone.

Crafted in the Commonwealth Lacrosse world headquarters in Franklin, MA, chone is as much of a word as it is a lifestyle. I can't take credit for the invention of the word, however, I can take credit for making it a part of everyone's every day to day vocabulary. Pronounced in a way that rhymes with phone or loan; chone is a word that can be used on almost any occassion as nearly any part of speech. It's incredibly versatile, similar to the Mariner's newest utility man, but they are not to be confused.

Chone refers to a rip that snaps the tag directly under the crossbar. It was originally used with the word upper as it's modifier. For example, the first time I heard it in a sentence while shooting on a cage, a wise man said to me "Watch me rip this biscuit upper chone while you're still too busy going side meat patty." (I promise that is an actual, direct, accurate quotation) However, it has developed into its own animal, with people crafting phrases like "Choney", "Chone Darts", "Chonemeiester", or the ever elusive "Chone Zone." Basically, if you are in the chone zone, you will not be stopped, and every shot will be nothing short of a ripper d.

The reaction to ripping chone can be handled one of two ways. If you're the OchoCinco type, you can act out a preemptively drawn up cele, causing a scene but possibly risking a two minute unsportsmanlike penalty. More commonly, you can take the Dan Milano approach and shrug it off, acting like you do it on the reg. The great one's have all done the latter, from Michael Jordan, to Eldrick himself. It's kind of like apologizing for what you just did, yet still having no remorse for the action you just took. I compare the Chone Shrug to when the ever thoughtful Pilgrims invited the Native Americans for the first Thanksgiving. Sorry for slaughtering your entire extended family, but here, have some cranberry sauce, it's legit. You just look in the face of the opponent in disbelief and simply say in a collected voice, "Chone?" And though they will be beyond furious, they will likely nod their heads, respecting a good chone as it happens.

Rarely, and I mean rarely, do long poles get the chance at chone glory. The greats have tried to bring the word into their habits on the barbaric end of the field, and we have welcomed their efforts with open arms, however the perfect remedy has yet to be found. The best thing about chone, see, is that has the ability to transfer between sports, as long as a net is involved. Rip one bar down from outside the 18 in FIFA? Chone. Zdeno Chara scores a power play goal on a slap shot from the blue line that knocks Ryan Miller's water bottle into the stands? Chone. When I watch the below video, and the shot that begins around the :5o second mark, there is really no combination of letters in the English language that describe it better than C-H-O-N-E.

So use it, spread it, embrace it. Because whether you like it or not now, the chone is here to stay and you are going to start hearing it a lot more often. It will slowly sweep the United States of America, and you will have me to thank for the early tip off. If you really can't stand it, may I recommend a little getaway for yourself? I heard there's some really nice beaches off the coast of Ecuador.

1 comment:

  1. Chone City

    The city is established on both sides of-winter-flowing river in his honor also carries his name (Rio Chone). It is located in the grasslands and lowest marsh, moist and fertile in the Ecuadorian coast, the third most populous canton of Manabi Province and one of the most extensive in the coastal region and the country. The history of this village is also planned in the revolutionary and rebellious sentiment of its inhabitants, having been one of the first cities in Ecuador that led to one of the symbolic-armed conflict highlights.